The crown aint worth much

“I’m scared to speak up at a meeting. I don’t want to sound stupid.” “I don’t want to risk saying something offensive, so I’ll just listen and say only innocuous things.” “I’m afraid if s/he sees me with my clothes off, s/he’ll be turned off. So I think I’ll put off dating for a while.” “I don’t want to risk the person pitying me or giving me unwanted advice so I won’t disclose my illness.” A client told me about having been embarrassed in the junior high school locker room changing into his gym clothes. While the other kids were bonding with locker room talk, he asked the teacher to give him a locker in the corner, away from all the other boys. Rather than telling you to get over such embarrassments and perhaps how to do so, I want to make the case here that often, inaction for fear of embarrassment is wise: It’s protective against people disliking you. We all have self-censoring mechanisms, often appropriately. For example, it may be wise to not share our … [Read more...] about Self-Consciousness as an Attribute

Source: Photo by Liz Fitch on Unsplash This post was co-authored by David Szwedo and Kristen Allen, a senior at James Madison University. Parents often have high hopes for how their children will turn out in adulthood, such as wanting them to be healthy, to feel satisfied with their career , and to have satisfying romantic relationships and strong friendships. But what factors help produce these outcomes as teens transition from adolescence to adulthood? Recent research suggests that a teen’s affect – especially positive affect – is one critical factor. What exactly is affect? Affect is the tendency to express positive or negative emotions, which in turn influences how we experience things and determine whether to judge a given situation as positive or negative. Affective responses to events typically happen automatically. Moreover, research suggests that a person’s affect is relatively stable over time, especially by the time one reaches adulthood. Affect is … [Read more...] about The Positive Effects of a Positive Affect

Source: agenturfotografin/Adobe Stock Seeing a therapist used to imply being in the same room with them, but not any longer. Teleconferencing has made it possible to see a mental health professional from a distance. With recent requirements for social distancing, many therapists and clients have had to either pause their work or make other arrangements, including meeting by video conference. I've been providing teletherapy services for about a decade now, and in the past year transitioned to doing only teletherapy. Here are some common questions and issues that come up when thinking about making the transition. Will My Therapist Agree to Online Sessions? Some therapists (myself included) are enthusiastic about using teletherapy, some won't use it at all, and a large number of therapists approach it with some reservations. I've been surprised how many therapists are now moving to it with the COVID-19 outbreak and resulting social distancing. Most therapists generally … [Read more...] about How to Transition to Seeing Your Therapist Online