There are certainly anecdotal reports of people being obsessed and/or ‘addicted’ to music’. One notorious case, is a Swedish man in his forties (Roger Tullgren) who receives state benefits from the Employment Service because of his ‘addiction’ to heavy metal music. Tullgren (with the help of three occupational psychologists) campaigned for ten years to get his condition classed as a ‘handicap’ so that he would not be discriminated against. In 2006 he claimed to have attended almost 300 heavy metal gigs and constantly missed work as a consequence. He was then sacked from his job because of his continual inability to turn up for work. With the help of psychologists, his lifestyle was subsequently classed as a disability (which in turn meant he was entitled to wage supplements). He now works at a hotel washing up and has been given a special dispensation to listen to heavy metal while he works. Other Swedish psychologists have found the ruling … [Read more...] about Going For a Song
People who are unhappy with love struggle with deciding when to call it quits. Their unhappiness tends to stem from some recurring conflict or pattern. They feel as if they can’t take it anymore, "I am done." Then, they run a mental calculus of the good and the bad then deduce they have already invested so much. Why not just stick it out? This back and forth neurosis can go on for months, years, and even decades in some cases. Now that we are in the middle of a pandemic many in this dilemma feel more stuck than ever before. Getting a divorce is complicated, moving out is complicated, and even if you are not married you may just feel profound guilt leaving your romantic partner in such an emotionally uncertain time or fear being alone yourself. … [Read more...] about Feeling Stuck in Your Romantic Relationship?
Unlike David, Jennifer works from home. She also takes on the majority of the childcare for their child. She struggles with the complicated juggling act of finding a way to balance her professional aspirations with her caregiving responsibilities. When Jennifer shares her woes with David, he troubleshoots by suggesting she drop some of the things on her to-do list; he figures she would be less frustrated if she stopped worrying so much. As David makes suggestions, Jennifer becomes increasingly frustrated, feeling that he doesn’t understand how hard her days are. She tells him that he is an insensitive and unsupportive partner. In turn, David gets angry with Jennifer for dismissing his earnest efforts to be there for her. … [Read more...] about A Simple Way to Improve Communication with Your Partner
At first glance, the injunction to be humble does not sound very attractive. It seems to be in conflict with our current valorization of self-esteem and self-worth, and to contradict the ubiquitous personal development advice that we should celebrate our achievements and take pride in ourselves. But humility does not mean meekness, and neither does it equate to weakness. In fact, this ancient virtue has nothing to do with adopting a self-effacing or submissive doormat mentality and is not to be mistaken simply for low self-esteem. Rather, humility is a form of spiritual modesty that is triggered by an understanding of our place in the order of things. … [Read more...] about The Art of Humility
Most cancer patients can remember at least one well-meaning comment from a friend who, attempting to be helpful, sets us into an emotional tailspin instead. My favorite were the people who hadn’t seen me for a while but knew I’d had cancer, who greeted me with, “How are you?” in a tone of pity-surprise-confusion that implied, at least to me, “Oh, you’re still alive, huh?” … [Read more...] about Improve Your Mood After A Cancer Diagnosis