Source: artist’s name not given/pixabay free image The Borderline's Monumental Ambivalence Toward Intimacy One relatively neglected explanation for the overblown rage so common in borderline personality disorders (BPD) relates to their unresolved trust issues. More often than not they were taught, however unintentionally, by their parents' unreliability, neglect, and criticism, not to trust them. That is, their caregivers weren't very caregiving . Such distrust in BPDs typically comes about quite early in their development, which is why many of the self-protective devices they adopted in reaction to their insufficient nurturing tend to be primitive. Overgeneralizing the family dynamic that engendered their distrust, they carry within them a deep ambivalence about how close they can safely get to others. They're also wary about permitting anyone to get very close to them. Emotionally, such closeness is experienced as too risky, since unconsciously it revivifies their childhood trauma of rejection and abandonment, of feeling desolate and all alone. Whether in the past they matched their parents' detachment with self-protective distancing of their own or resorted to clinging or people-pleasing behavior in hopes of establishing a greater attachment to them (or maybe just one of them), at some point they became aware that they… Read full this story
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